The lost decade? In our 30s, we’ve left behind the confusion of career establishment in our 20s but still far from the thoughts of retirement that come in our 50s. But are we just cruising right along in our careers? We talk with a local expert who works with thirtysomethings to address their specific work concerns.
Wisdom is a funny thing. You don’t just have it; it takes effort to get it. It is either through experience – often life’s trials and errors – or through education that we get it. Many of us often wonder how much easier parts of our lives would have been if we just had the wisdom we now hold back in our previous years. I think back to my 20s, when life was still a bit jumbled with finding my true path in terms of my career. Eventually, after trying a few careers on for size, I found my way and headed back to graduate school after college to fuel a career in local government – only to change it in my 30s for this writing life. Firmly in my 40s, I am comfortable with the choices I’ve made so far and relish new opportunities that my work life will bring in the future.
Stuck in the middle?
For many of us, you may have a similar work life story. Our 20s are filled with excitement of new challenges and, if we’re being honest, a little confusion and fear. By the time we reach our 40s, we’ve typically reached career plateaus in terms of promotions and earnings. But while we may be on cruise control, we are looking ahead to thoughts of maybe changing careers, perhaps starting a new business, or even retirement.
But wait. What happened to that decade in between? What about life in our thirties? Are we too exhausted raising kids and maybe even taking care of our aging parents as well to think about our careers? Heck no, says Rick Marshall, Strategist and Coach with the Rick Marshall Group. Based in Weatherford, Marshall helps his clients build a solid foundation for moving forward in their careers and all aspects of life. What he’s found is that workers in their thirties are dealing with lots of stress from outlying forces and also forces from within. “There’s lots of self-imposed pressure at this stage of life and career. Over time, my clients learn to separate what matters from what may not be serving them. They gain the confidence to reference the bigger plan to then easily make tactical decisions in daily life,” said Marshall.
His clients, especially those in their thirties, are able to do this by changing their perception of themselves. With regard to their work life, they are no longer a person, but rather a business with their own unique brand. “When a person makes the transition to seeing themselves as their own business that has built a personal brand that others want to buy from, there is a very real ‘light bulb moment’ that occurs,” Marshall said. Furthermore, according to Marshall, this business and brand must be built upon the following four cornerstones: resourcefulness, financial stability, dependability and integrity. “It’s so important at this age to live within ones means. Avoid the quick fix of the trappings of success - a big house and mortgage, high-end cars and spontaneous spending. Build the foundation in your thirties to enjoy life without the relentless pressures of debt,” said Marshall. “Focus on being the type of employee that is easily distinguished at work, not necessarily by working the most hours but instead focused on work while at work. Developing a daily plan that allows you to remain clear of what matters to accomplish today and making a commitment to a daily plan will make an incredible difference. Your follow-through will rapidly distinguish you from your peer group. Remember, you are the brand you present to others.”
Thirtysomething challenges
When I asked Marshall to list the top five challenges for thirtysomethings in terms of work and how they can be addressed, he formulated his answers in terms of building on those four cornerstones he laid out above:
Communication: “Clearly at the top of the list of challenges is communication, specifically the open and honest communication essential to a solid relationship with your spouse or significant other. A relationship is the coming together of two individual sets of dreams and goals merged into a sharing vision of now and the future. In your thirties, one or both of you are coming into your own in your career. What will our family look like? School? Activities? Structuring a profitable financial plan? A near endless number of challenges or incredible opportunities depending on your willingness to communicate; to listen and speak respectfully, to get clearly on the same page. To build in essence a partnership in support of your individual and joint goals.”
Peer identification: “Peer identification is a unique challenge to being in your thirties. Up until now, the group called peers has been greatly defined by age. Now it is career-critical to establish a peer group that fits your business plan going forward. A powerful exercise with my clients is to develop a list of people internally and externally to their company that they would like to be associated with. To build a successful career one needs visibility within the community. We next plan strategy for how to make the introductions and how to cultivate the relationships.”
Time outside of work: “There are so many chances to get pulled in different directions. How to balance the role of husband, wife, mother or father? Balancing activities is the formula for a balanced life. Make a long list of possibilities ranging from time with the kids, to time with parents and other family members along with including community involvement. Having the list of possibilities combined with open communication creates an opportunity through choice to build a personal life you can be proud of.”
Continual transition. “Continual transition is essential to growth, but it can be quite challenging to thirtysomethings. Career wise, things are beginning to work according to plan. Those that openly communicate are also seeing things working well. This is exactly the time to transition to getting bigger. The move to getting bigger is only difficult in the initial steps, quite easy in the middle and then gets boring as heck unless one is embracing continual transition. To grow is to be human. In our DNA is the need to express our contribution in an ever bigger way.”
Financial planning. “Life as a thirtysomething or frankly at any age is a huge challenge if feeling the limitations of personal debt. Debt removes possibility thinking. Debt is a major distraction and should be avoided with your full attention and intention. Having money in the bank creates possibilities. Savings allow you to focus on creating a life for you and your family. Consider for a moment the power of making this a choice versus a challenge. If you happen to be currently behind the eight ball of debt consider taking action through a program like Dave Ramsey’s. Adopting a financial plan that is built around maximum savings and minimal debt will allow you to achieve financial stability, which is a cornerstone of career success.”
For more information about Marshall and the Rick Marshall Group, visit www.rickmarshallgroup.com.
This story was originally published January 21, 2018 at 12:00 AM with the headline "The lost decade? In our 30s, we’ve left behind the confusion of career establishment in our 20s but still far from the thoughts of retirement that come in our 50s. But are we just cruising right along in our careers? We talk with a local expert who works with thirtysomethings to address their specific work concerns.."