Fort Worth Arlington Heights’ alum left Texas out of concern for his transgender son
Mike Taylor’s daughter was 4 when she told her dad, “I don’t like being Molly.”
The name wasn’t the problem.
Taylor just figured he had a tomboy, and thought nothing of it until his child said she didn’t like wearing a dress.
She was 5.
“I was sure this all just a phase,” he said. “Because 10 years ago if you had asked me about transgender I would have told you this is a mental issue, like bi-polar disorder. Before this, I would have been labeled a transphobe. If I can overhaul the way I think, and who I was, anyone can.”
Taylor is a Fort Worth native who graduated from Arlington Heights in 1993, and started a successful career in sports talk radio at ESPN 103.3 in Arlington.
Taylor has been a staple of San Antonio’s scene with an afternoon sports talk show for more than 10 years, but he moved to Austin, and then to Hawaii, to get out of Texas for his kid, whose name now is MJ.
Mike Taylor is not apt to return to Texas just yet in light of Gov. Greg Abbott’s new directive that would potentially order the state’s welfare officials to investigate alleged incidents of children receiving gender-affirming care.
“(MJ) knows one of the reasons we moved to Hawaii is because there are some people in the government’s office who aren’t nice to his people,” said Taylor, 47. “Most people are. I don’t want him to think he’s an outcast because he’s not. The second he gets it in his head that he’s ‘abnormal,’ it would screw him up like any kid.
“I’m telling you, if you spent 10 minutes with my kid you’d say, ‘That’s a dude.’”
‘We have a son’
MJ has a twin sister.
After about two years of telling his mom and that he didn’t like his name, the family of four went to Hawaii for a vacation.
They took a surf lesson from an instructor named Ben.
After arriving back to Texas, MJ asked his parents to call him Ben. While his parents were still reluctant to move forward with transgender affirmation, they agreed on using the initials MJ for the 6-year-old.
One day Mike found a hidden stack of self-addressed letters that MJ had written.
“The letters said, ‘My mommy and daddy know I’m a boy,’” Taylor said. “This is my kid writing this. And my kid wasn’t showing anyone these.
“The truth is I was embarrassed, and I was putting myself ahead of my kid.”
MJ was playing softball at the time, but had a problem with the color of the jersey: Pink.
“MJ comes to me and says, ‘I don’t want to play softball; I want to play baseball. I’m a boy. I’d rather sit on the bench of a baseball team than start for the softball team.’
“It was at this point we had to come to grips that we have a son, that MJ has female parts, but a boy’s brain,” he said. “We sought counseling, and support groups.”
Although they lived in Austin at the time — which Taylor said is far more tolerant than other regions in the state — the lack of protections, and potential for punishments, for transgender people in Texas is why they decided to move.
MJ was 7 when the Taylors moved to Hawaii, a state that is far more accepting.
“If you don’t recognize my son for who he is, the odds of him becoming homeless, or a drug addict, goes up by 50 percent; the suicide rate is far worse,” he said.
According to a report by NBC News, approximately 40 percent of transgender adults said they attempted suicide in their lifetime.
“If your parents don’t recognize you for who you are, it (messes) you up,” Taylor said. “I don’t want to mess up my son, and he’s a happy kid and proud of who he is.”
Adapting to a transgender child
It has been about three years since Taylor’s family affirmed MJ’s gender.
“To see how he has blossomed as a human being is amazing,” Taylor said. “The day he cut his hair above his shoulders it was a like he became a different child. It was like he was born again as a kid.
“This has been the most wonderful thing for this kid. To hell with the outside noise and society. We saved this kid’s life.”
Because MJ is 10, and a few years away from puberty, the Taylors are not thinking about any type of hormonal blockers, or drugs associated with transgender therapy.
Taylor is not leaning in that direction, and he does not condone gender re-assignment surgery before a child turns 18, which is not allowed by law.
There have been negative consequences to the Taylor’s affirming MJ’s gender. It has damaged relationships within Taylor’s family, to the point where some of them don’t speak to him any more.
They’re living in Hawaii, a far more expensive place to live.
Mike and his wife are separated, but he says nothing about MJ’s development played any role in the marriage ending.
He and MJ’s mom both have agreed to speak up on this issue when asked, as much for their own son as for the other families who are going through potentially painful evolution.
“I don’t want to go war with anyone,” he said. “What I want is for everyone to get it. I get that people don’t get it. I didn’t.
“Just like you can’t go to church and make people not be gay, you can’t change this, either. Whatever people said about Black people in the ‘50s, or gay people in the ‘70s, they’re saying that now about transgenders. Outsiders have made this a civil rights movement.
“The thing that makes me mad about these laws in Texas, what’s the percentage of people who are transgender? It’s point nothing. What is the point?”
According to the Williams Institute of Law at UCLA, roughly 1.4 million adults in the United States identify as transgender. That’s 0.78 percent of the adult population of the country.
“We don’t want anything extra. Just treat him regular, because he is,” Taylor said. “He hasn’t done a damn thing wrong. For those who attack him is for nothing. I’d ask for people to change their hearts because what’s the point in hating my kid?”
This story was originally published March 3, 2022 at 5:00 AM.
