MLB beards 2016: The hits, the misses and the musty

The beard as a fad is not going anywhere, it seems, especially in the baseball world.

Most major league rosters are filled with beards of all shapes and sizes. The Rangers, for instance, have more players with beards than not.

“To me, the whole idea of having a beard is kind of saying I really don’t care what other people think about me,” said Rangers reliever Tom Wilhelmsen, who has had some level of beard since his major league debut in 2011. Wilhelmsen comes from the Hunter Pence school of beards. These are the players who just let it grow out without much manicuring. Others, with fuller, more complicated beards, could have teams of stylists working to create the right kind of shape and style. That’s not for Wilhelmsen.

“I look at [Astros pitcher] Dallas Keuchel and his perfectly trimmed and manicured beard and that makes me laugh,” he said. “It’s kind of an oxymoron.”

Awesome. Anything to add fuel to the fire in the Lone Star Series.

The Rangers will see Keuchel’s spectacle of a beard soon down in Houston.

In the meantime, twirl your fingers through your beard (men only, hopefully!) while scrolling through 20 of the beardiest players in the major leagues at the moment, including Keuchel and a few Rangers:

1. The Male Model

Bryce Harper is not only the best player in the game, but he’s arguably got the best beard game, too. Forget Sports Illustrated, he belongs on the cover of GQ.

2. The Backwoodsman

Former TCU pitcher Andrew Cashner could have a family of rodents nesting in his voluptuous beard.

3. The All-Beard Battery

When Cashner is pitching to catcher Derek Norris Grizzly Adams is smiling down from heaven. The combined facial hair between the battery mates could be woven into a nice-sized shawl.

4. The Red Beard

The Rockies’ right-hander Eddie Butler rocks the classiest red-haired beard in the league. Not all of these can be funny.

5. The Eddie Vedder

Braves pitcher Jason Grilli keeps a well-manicured beard. Combine that with the long hair and a moment of pain and you suddenly have an Eddie Vedder lookalike.

6. The Professional

Jason Heyward keeps his beard trimmed close and orderly. Baseball is his business and he looks all business.

7. The Goatee

Rangers spark plug Rougned Odor is a player opposing fans love to hate. His burgeoning goatee is a perfect accessory for his fearless game.

8. The Quackenbush

Padres pitcher Kevin Quackenbush doesn’t have an especially odd beard. He’s just one of many on the beard-laden Padres’ roster. But that name, Quackenbush, it stands out and goes well with a beard.

9. The Amish

Rangers rookie Nomar Mazara is one of the few sporting the mustacheless beard. He started growing it in rookie ball. He clipped the mustache because it was itchy.

10. The Reformed

Mike Napoli has been a member of the All-Beard team for years. In the past, including last season with the Rangers, he’s let it blossom into a full-blown Backwoodsman. But for the Indians so far this season, he’s kept it closely shaved.

11. The Goatee Gone

Orioles pitcher Yovani Gallardo has trimmed back the substantial goatee he kept while with the Rangers in 2015.

12. The Long Game

Astros ace Dallas Keuchel has kept a lengthy beard for several years. Statcast doesn’t keep this stat (at least I don’t think it does!) but Keuchel likely has the longest beard the majors.

13. The Old School

Rangers slugger Prince Fielder has kept a classy, full beard that harkens back to sports heroes of the 1970s, a decade flush with facial hair highlights.

14. The Sigmund Freud

Brewers’ infielder Jonathan Lucroy is probably a perfectly well-adjusted adult so I’m not trying to psychoanalyze him. His pointed beard, at least in this shot, suggests he should be teaching economic theory at a private college back east.

15. The Saint

Jayson Werth’s long hair and ample beard come together to give him a saintly look.

16. The Fade

Royals pitcher Kelvin Herrera keeps a well-manicured beard that appears to fade from his chin towards both ears. This would be too much work for you and I, but professional baseball players typically have hair stylists visit the clubhouse on a regular basis.

17. The Patch

Giants starting pitcher Jeff Samardzija looks like he might struggle to grow a full-on beard. So he does the next best thing, I guess. If he wasn’t a professional baseball player, he’d fit right in with an early ‘90s alt-grunge tribute band.

18. The Brian Wilson Tribute

Angels pitcher Matt Shoemaker seems to be carrying the torch of beard Hall of Famer Brian Wilson. Not only is it full, but it seems especially black.

19. The Classic

Royals pitcher Ian Kennedy is with his fourth team since the Yankees drafted him in the first round in 2006. No matter where he’s pitching he’s donning a full classic-looking face of hair.

20. The Wild Man

Former Arlington High and UT Arlington star Hunter Pence has kept some level of facial hair with the Giants. When the Giants are doing well and in the playoffs, Pence’s beard takes on a life of its own. Perhaps it’s his emotive eyes that give his beard a jolt of electricity.

This story was originally published May 10, 2016 at 10:55 AM with the headline "MLB beards 2016: The hits, the misses and the musty."