Despite being an intriguing and, well, I think, an exciting addition to the Dallas Mavericks, Chandler Parsons will immediately join our list of local jock kingdom members who fall into one dubious category:
The numbers nerds, far and near, have spoken.
Chandler, say hello to Tony Romo, and to Choo-Choo Man, and to Mr. Fielder, and yes, Brandon Carr, among others. Adrian Beltre was also once in that fraternity, but has since graduated to well-worth-it status.
Have you ever noticed that those who call others “overpaid” are people who aren’t or never will be overpaid?
First, you aren’t overpaid if someone is willing to pay you. Your market value is what your paycheck says it is, or at least until further notice.
The 25-year-old Parsons, a 6-foot-9 forward, has been a young and developing semi-star for the Houston Rockets, but when it came time for the hip-pocket evaluation of his talent, that team backed off and backed out.
Mark Cuban’s so-called crazy-money offer for Parsons had Rockets GM Daryl Morey reaching for the mosquito spray, which in Houston this time of year is more important than oxygen.
Morey obviously didn’t think Parsons could be “the” third star in Houston behind Dwight Howard and James Harden.
So the Mavs paid third-star money, or with this team, maybe second-star money, amounting to $46 million for three years.
The Mavericks could afford this while the Rockets’ couldn’t.
Because Dirk is Dirk, the most generous German ever born. Nowitzki agreed to a new three-year contract for the NBA version of chicken scratch, $25 million.
As a point of NBA financial reference, Lance Stephenson, a player who appears legit insane, also signed a free-agent contract last week. It was three years, $27 million, with Charlotte.
Dirk gave the monster hometown discount, opening up the Mavs’ salary cap vault. Dirk had already said it was about winning, not money. From that mouth, the truth flowed.
But it would have made no basketball sense to bring in Parsons, not a good defender, if the Mavs had not made their other off-season grand grab.
Tyson Chandler is back, and ignore what Cuban now claims, because this was an admission that allowing Chandler to walk after the world championship season was box-of-rocks stupid.
But why believe me? Just check the Mavericks’ record in the three seasons after Chandler left.
But with Tyson patrolling the middle again, the addition of Parsons is a solid basketball move in free agency. Coach Rick Carlisle says Parsons will improve as a defender, and when Rick says it, I don’t doubt it.
Otherwise, Parsons is a guy who can score, he can dish and he’s not bad as a rebounder.
Overpaid? That will be determined in the next three seasons, but based on all the current circumstances involved, this was not an overreach by the Mavericks.
Plus, if Parsons is a total bust, $46 million over three years is not a long-term financial anvil around the team.
Not like, say, Romo’s contract with the Cowboys.
Tony got $55 million guaranteed on an announced deal of $108 million. Over the course of the contract, Romo will probably pocket around $75 million.
No quarterback in the NFL is ever overpaid. It’s the toughest position in all of sports. But the killer was Tony being 32 when he signed that deal two years ago, guaranteeing that over the next five seasons the Cowboys could not draft a quarterback in the first round and develop him.
It’s going to be all Tony all the time, except when he’s injured.
The overpaying part involved Tony not having the track record to deserve that kind of money. And the money closed the door for five years on having a high-draft quarterback in the wings.
With Romo, it’s not about being overpaid. His contract is overkill.
I once nominated Romo for having the “worst” contract in town, but hold on here. We appear to have a strong contender closing in fast for the “worst” title.
That’s you, Choo.
Shin-Soo Choo was the Rangers’ free agency addition in the off-season. Now 32, he signed for seven years, $130 million. As a reminder, in baseball that $130 million is not NFL fake money. It’s a real $130 mil.
As a hitter, Choo’s been a major disappointment, to say the least. As an outfielder, he’s flat awful.
A nagging ankle injury hasn’t helped, but Jon Daniels, the GM love child of the owners, had better be saying a nightly baseball prayer that all of Choo’s problems are related to the ankle.
If not, Jon will be losing neck-nuzzling status with an ownership that already seems to be fretting over the shrinking bottom line.
Another of Daniels’ many headaches in his Titanic season is Prince Fielder. He’s 30, he’s owed $114 million over the next six years and he’s a fat guy who has just suffered the first major injury of his career.
When fat guys start to break down they normally don’t stop breaking down.
I liked the trade for Fielder. The Rangers were desperate for power, and particularly left-handed power.
But at the moment, I wouldn’t want to be holding the $114 million mortgage on Fielder, and dang sure wouldn’t want anything to do with the $130 million mortgage on Choo.
And yet, the numbers nerds are currently calling out Chandler Parsons as a grievous overpayment.
Not true. And by comparison with some other local jock kingdom members, Parsons is actually trending as a semi-sound investment.
Leave a message for Randy Galloway at 817-390-7697.