ShareHave more to add? News tip? Tell us
Putting on our Sunday best …
Jerry Jones said beating the Atlanta Falcons today would give the Cowboys "real credibility." Raise your hand if you remember a time when the team with the chance to gain credibility was the team playing the Cowboys, not the Cowboys. Wow — look at all the hands in the air.So, if the Cowboys do win a credibility-earning game today against the Falcons, how big will that celebration be?Finally, someone at Valley Ranch is concerned about Roy Williams. Wade Phillips said he is concerned about Williams’ ribs, not his numbers, but at least there’s concern. I guess that’s progress.Patrick Crayton says he was not told that he was being replaced by Miles Austin in the starting lineup. The Cowboys were that close to being flagged for 12 men on the field on their first play today.Ollie the Optimist said he is certain that if Williams is unable to play today and Patrick Crayton takes his place in the starting lineup, someone will tell Crayton.Don’t be surprised if new TCU athletic director Chris Del Conte comes in and talks about raising the bar. In college, he was a high jumper.For those of you who have lost track of the United Football League: The Florida Tuskers are 3-0, the Las Vegas Locomotives are 1-1, the California Redwoods are 1-2 and the New York Sentinels are 0-2. For the rest of you: There is a United Football League.Here’s something that should make us want to pick up our thimbles and fight: An American has not won the Monopoly World Championship since 1974. We invented that game!We need to change the name of NASCAR’s Chase for the Sprint Cup to the Chase for Jimmie Johnson.I don’t know if "rolling over in their grave" is a popular expression in England, but I wonder if there isn’t some rolling over taking place with the "New England Patriots" playing in London.NFL commissioner Roger Goodell said there is "tremendous interest" in placing a franchise in London. Of course, he has said the same thing about Los Angeles.Notes to our friends in London: 1.) Not all of our coaches dress as badly as Bill Belichick; 2.) Not all of our teams play as badly as the Tampa Bay Buccaneers.Bucs coach Raheem Morris called the Patriots "a great model to follow." Morris must have watched film of the Patriots’ 59-0 dismantling of the Tennessee Titans last week and decided kissing up was the best thing he could do for his team.The Washington Redskins have said coach Jim Zorn will not be fired during the season. That means the Redskins’ next coach said he did not want to take over midseason.News we couldn’t make up if we wanted to: San Diego Chargers linebacker Larry English was fined $7,500 for a horse-collar tackle, and Cincinnati Bengals receiver Chad Ochocinco was fined $10,000 for wearing a black chin strap instead of a white one.Stu Jackson, NBA executive vice president of basketball operations: "We have not changed the traveling rule, nor how we enforce the rule." That quote implies that the NBA has been enforcing the traveling rule.The Cleveland Cavaliers have brought in award-winning chef Michael Symon to upgrade the food at their arena. Said Symon: "My food is very approachable." Maybe this is because I’m a sportswriter, but I thought all food was very approachable.Follow sports humor columnist David Thomas on Twitter @FansInsider.David Thomas, 817-390-7760
@Nyx.CommentBody@