Posted on Sun, Nov. 30, 2008

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All this BCS politicking is just too much

Putting on our Sunday best ...

Help me out here. Does "Bedlam Series" refer to Oklahoma-Oklahoma State or the BCS?

I’m not saying all this politicking for position in the BCS rankings is getting out of hand, but I heard that Mack Brown is interviewing for a campaign manager.

Good thing they keep the score on the television screen these days. Otherwise, I would have thought the Texas Longhorns were beating the Texas A&M Aggies 45-35.

How many times on Thursday do you think Roy Williams gave thanks for being traded to the Dallas Cowboys?

A combination you just can’t beat no matter how hard you try: those chemicals in the Thanksgiving turkey and a Detroit Lions game.

I wonder if Matt Millen watched the Lions’ game Thursday. And if he didn’t, he should have been forced to.

Pick the correct answer. After halftime, the first text message the Jonas Brothers sent friends read: A.) We just played at halftime of a Cowboys game!; B.) We got to perform at Texas Stadium before they tear it down!; C.) Our backup dancers were the Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders!!!

Marion Barber dislocated his pinkie toe? This has been a bad year for pinkies at Valley Ranch.

Ollie the Optimist claims he isn’t superstitious, but I have my doubts. Ollie doesn’t understand why everyone is so excited about Tony Romo possibly taking his splint off for next week’s game. The Cowboys are 3-0 with Romo’s splint, Ollie says, so why change what’s working?

Pacman Jones is back again. So, what date do you have in your office pool?

This, however, is absolutely, unequivocally, without doubt, the last chance for Pacman. Again.

Tom Brady told a Boston TV station that he is "doing well." So is Matt Cassel.

Wow. I know times are tough, and cutbacks are occurring everywhere. But did you see they even cut the modern pentathlon from five events to four? I guess we now have the ultra-modern pentathlon.

To attract more TV viewers during the Olympics, the International Modern Pentathlon Union voted to combine pistol shooting with running. No, that’s not one competitor shooting at another competitor who is running, although that probably would boost ratings.

Former Oakland Raiders coach Lane Kiffin has reportedly agreed to a deal to become new coach of the Tennessee Volunteers. Reports say his contract will pay him more than the $2 million per year he made with the Raiders. So Kiffin gets a raise and won’t have to work for Al Davis? Now that’s a good deal.

Charles Barkley ripped LeBron James for talking about becoming a free agent two years down the road, saying if he were LeBron, he would shut up. I can’t see Barkley, no matter who he might be at the time, ever shutting up.

Man, if you thought the Black Friday line at Toys R Us was long, have you taken a look lately at the players lining up at the Dallas Stars’ goal waiting for a chance to score?

The PGA Tour is again tinkering with its formula for the FedEx Cup in hopes of having the winner determined at its season-ending Tour Championship, not before. If it weren’t for the BCS, we would be saying the PGA Tour has the worst postseason format in sports.

David Thomas’ sports humor column appears Sundays and Wednesdays.